A House Divided?

     If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand. (Mark 3:25.)  We need a leader who is going to work diligently to UNITE this country.  I don't believe our sitting President has done a good job of this yet (I say yet because I'm an optimist.)  If he had, I think he would've won by a LOT more than what he did.  But to be fair, even if Romney would have won this election, how sure are we that he would have done any better at uniting America?  If you're a Christian, the best thing you/I can do for America to help make it better is fervently pray for our current leader and our other government officials who were elected to work for ALL the American people.  Start praying NOW for the right person to be elected in 2016.  

I think the next best thing everyone can do to help make America better is be aware of and look for opportunities in your own little world.  When you see someone in need of help, HELP THEM whether it's making them a meal or raking their leaves. We don't need to rely on the government for all our needs.  If you get a bonus at work, save some but spend some too. It's okay to spend money and get the economy going just watch your budget.

Also, if only THIS would happen....RESPECT one another.  There is a reason one believes this or the other believes that.  Don't be so pigheaded that you can't even try to understand the one who has opposing views.

     Lastly, remember God's timing is perfect.  He is still King.  He is still the only One who sees everything.  If you really want a better life, learn to trust HIM first and all else will seem like it doesn't matter as much.  Your worries won't be worries because you know God's got it. 
  

The Timing of "The Talk"

Matthew at 6 years old

When do you have "the talk" with your child?  I feel as if I'm being forced to introduce something to Matthew earlier than necessary.  Why?  Because even though I can opt out of having Matthew participate in the human sexuality class that will be taught during school, the majority, if not all of his friends and classmates will be participating.  Hence, conversations with some of Matt's more vocal friends where Matt will be present may take place which then forces our hands to go ahead and have that conversation with Matthew.

Granted, this program is a faith based program.  I opted to preview the material ahead of time before deciding whether or not to give Matt permission to participate.  The program presents the information from a Christian view point so I am very pleased with that.  The chapters prior to the sexual intercourse section talk about love, relationships and commitment as in marriage.  All good stuff.  I am just so conflicted with the TIMING of this in MY son's life.  Eleven years old and he will be learning what sexual intercourse is.  Okay, so some may say, "Tre, maybe it's you and Dennis who aren't willing to accept the fact your son is growing up and needs to learn about this."  I say, "I am not naive and I KNOW he needs to learn about this and WILL learn about this but I was hoping it would be decided by us, Den and me, when that time would be to introduce this talk.  I have even thought and prayed about whether or not I am the one being unreasonable, that maybe Den and I are over thinking this."  I keep hearing, "You know your child better than anyone else."   Matthew is a young sixth grader.  He is so very innocent compared to some of the other students.  He watches Sponge Bob and plays Mario Kart and still builds his Legos sets.  He sleeps with a stuffed dog named Patch.  He doesn't desire a cell phone or iPod.  Trust me, I have asked him if he wants these things and he always says, "Naaahhh."  He does have a flip cell phone only because we don't have a house phone anymore but it is otherwise always turned off just because he has no interest in it.  I realize none of this stuff is as important as learning about the human body and how life is created, but as Dennis said to me yesterday, "It's a shame.  We just keep introducing stuff to our kids (that they do need to learn about) but it  keeps coming at earlier and earlier ages whether they're ready for it or not."

Matt and me - 1st grade field trip to the zoo

So, I sit here, reminded of the world we live in.  Our children are growing up faster than we did and they need to be prepared for what lies ahead.  (I even asked my son, Chris (almost 21) if he thought his brother was ready for this.  His response?  "I don't think I would have been ready for that talk in the 6th grade!") But, here we are. I may not like the fact Matthew is going to have this talk presented to him earlier than what Den and I would have planned but I am grateful I have a God I can pray to for guidance in this.  The timing for this may not be what I agree with but I know God can prepare all of our hearts to make the timing just right, for, "We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him who have been called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28   God knows our hearts.  God knows Matthew's heart.  I pray God will honor our commitment to our children by being present in all the talks Matthew will be involved in and that the information is accepted according to how God would have Matthew accept it.  I am going to stop fretting about it and trust that God's got this just as He has taken care of all our other issues, big or small, in our lives.  He is so good!

God Is NEVER Wrong

My mom with Matthew in 2010.

        My mom forwarded this email to me and I just had to share.  I'm not sure of the author or where it originated from but what a great story to ponder.  It is so relevant to what's going on in our little world and in our lives.  The housing market which doesn't allow owners to refinance because they're upside down.  The unemployed who have been searching and applying for job after job.  The barren woman who desperately cries out, "Why can I not conceive, Lord?"  The parent of a wayward child.  The one who is fighting disease.  The one whose spouse or child is fighting disease.  We all have our cross to carry for a reason.  God knows why.  He sees beyond what we ever could.  Trust Him because He is never wrong.

GOD IS NEVER WRONG!!   A king who did not believe in the goodness of God, had a slave who, in all circumstances, said: My king, do not be discouraged, because everything God does is perfect, no mistakes!    One day they went hunting and along the way a wild animal attacked the king. His slave managed to kill the animal, but could not prevent his majesty from losing a finger.    Furious and without showing his gratitude for being saved, the nobleman said "Is God good? If He was good, I would not have been attacked and lost my finger."    The slave replied only "My king, despite all these things, I can only tell you that God is good, and He knows the "why" of all these things. What God does is perfect. He is never wrong!"    Outraged by the response, the king ordered the arrest of his slave.    Later, he left for another hunt and was captured by savages who made human sacrifices. In the altar, ready to sacrifice the noble, a savage had found that the victim had not one of his fingers,and the king was released. According to them: he was not complete so he couldn't be offered to the gods.  Upon his return to the palace, he authorized the release of his slave that he received very affectionately.    - My dear, God was really good for me! I was almost killed by the wild men, but for lack of a single finger, I was let go! But I have a question: If God is so good, why did he allow me to put you in jail?   My King, if I had gone with you in this hunt, I 'would have been sacrificed for you, because I have no missing finger.  Therefore, remember: everything God does is perfect. It is never wrong!  Often we complain about life and things that happen to us apparently negative,  forgetting that nothing is random and that everything has a purpose.    Every morning, offer your day to God.  Ask God to inspire your thoughts, guide  your actions, to ease your feelings. And do not be afraid. God is never wrong!   You know why this message is for you? I do not know, but God knows, because He never makes mistakes.  The path of God and His Word is perfect, without impurities. IT is the way of all those who trust in Him, as He says in Samuel  22: 31.    Surely the message arrived at the right moment. May God put in your heart the desire to send it to someone. Do not be ashamed to send it to the right person .  God knows, He knows why.   God is never wrong!            

     This is so relevant to the title of my blog, God's Timing is Perfect.  We can't see beyond the moment we are in, but God does.  We imagine and plan out the way we THINK things should go.  Planning is good but circumstances can change in a heartbeat.  Our natural tendency is to complain and get angry when bad things happen to us or when OUR plan gets interrupted, just like the king did in this story.  We get angry with God because life isn't going our way.  We then unfairly take it out on other people, usually the ones closest to us. Never mind all the good things in your life.  For some reason we get amnesia when it comes to the things we should be grateful for. 

     I think we have a couple choices: 1. We can go on doing life OUR way, getting agitated day after day with the fact that the role we've taken on (playing God) just isn't working out.  Or, 2. We can change our thinking and give our lives to God.  We can still have a plan but pray first and line our plan up with God's plan.  If you're truly believing when you pray that you want God's will and not your own, then these little hiccups that interrupt your plan won't be that much of a surprise because you know God's got it (and He's never wrong.)

Fact is, we will still get it wrong from time to time even when we've lined ourselves up with God.  We will react like the king did in this story, get angry, complain and take it out on a loved one not trying to see the positive anywhere.  We are only human.  The question is, after you've cooled off, will you look for the lesson?  Will you look back and say, "OH!  I GET IT NOW!  If not for that happening then this would have happened", (usually something much worse)? And once you've seen the lesson, will you learn from it and make amends like the king did?  He immediately released his slave from prison.  Each experience, hiccup in your life can be used as a stepping stool for your faith to grow stronger and stronger but you must first let go and ALLOW God to map things out for you because as always, His ways and His timing are always perfect. Trust Him even in what you consider to be your darkest hours.

The Time is Now

     What is it that prevents you from doing some sort of exercise on a regular basis?  Is it lack of time?  Sorry, that can never be your excuse because if you're reading this right now, it means you could be using this FB time to do a small workout.  Could your excuse be you don't have the money to join a fitness club or to buy any equipment or dumbbell weights?  Sorry, that can't be an excuse either.  Using your own body weight at home to do push ups, squats, lunges, calf raises, sit ups or crunches is all you need to get yourself started for strength training.  For cardio, you don't need fancy equipment like treadmills, stairmasters or ellipticals.  If you have two working legs and two working feet and a pair of tennis shoes then a short run or walk is all it takes to get things started.  Find a track where bleachers are present and use them as your stairmaster.  Heck, you most likely have stairs at home.  Set a timer and go up and down them a few times.  Prolong the time each time you do this.  You say you would love to take a Zumba class or other type of cardio class but can't because you have small children which prevents you from going out? 

Matt and me playing Just Dance 3 on the Wii

Many gaming systems have Zumba, Dancing, and other exercise type games that can be swapped out for those video games that keep you seated on your butt.  This way you will be killing two birds with one stone: spending quality, fun time with your children and exercising at the same time.  What an example for your kids.  And trust me, you will be sweating and burning calories!

 You say, "But it's hard to do a pushup."  Or, "I really do not like to run!"  Or even,"I have back and neck issues and sit ups wreak havoc in those areas of my body!"  Again, those aren't good excuses to not start some sort of work out regimen. Baby steps and modifying are the key.  Start with wall pushups and you will gradually go down to the floor and do a few pushups while on your knees.  After my breast cancer surgeries, I couldn't do any type of exercises  that would affect my chest muscles so when I finally was able to start incorporating strength training to my upper body again, I had to start all over again by doing wall pushups.  I still hate pushups and I can't do many the proper way but it will come just like it WILL come for you!  As for running?  Not everyone likes to run, so then WALK!  It's great exercise and gentle on your joints.  There are many 5K walks you can participate in for a small fee.  But if you're one who wants to try your hand at running but don't know where to begin, there's this thing called GOOGLE, you may have heard of it, where you can search for a plan to help you train for a specific goal.  Ab work doesn't have to be all sit ups.  Standing ab crunches work pretty darn good as well as bending side to side at the waist for a few reps.

Race for the Cure w/Matt and my mom

You say, "But there's no way I will look like a supermodel", (or in a man's case, a sexy underwear model.)  That shouldn't be your goal.  Your goal should be you want to be HEALTHY.  Your thinking should be you want to start treating this body God gave you with the care it deserves.  Everything else eventually falls, or rather, LIFTS into place.   Obviously eating habits must begin to change as well, but it CAN be done.  Expectations should be high but reasonable.  Doing a few squats or taking one 20 minute walk and expecting to see results right away is not reasonable. It is a lifestyle change

one must decide to make and then stick with. Starting out is always the hardest but determination will get you through.  Make the choice to invest in yourself.  The time is now.

A Birthday Blog for an Unbelievable Man

He watches chick flicks with me.  He rubs my feet.  He works so hard to earn a living for us so that I don't have to work outside the home.  When things get tight  and I even mention a thought of maybe I should pull my weight a little in the financial department by getting a job, he ups his game and voila is earning that extra bonus at work.  Delivering phone books years ago as a family brought in extra income.  Looking for ways to cut back and reassuring me he's got this has always been his MO.  He takes his job as the head of the household seriously. He truly appreciates having me home taking care of the kids and the house and of course, him.  It's partly a pride thing on his part (having me stay home) because he feels HE should provide for us but he also knows I really am in my dream job. 

As a father, he absolutely takes pride and joy in his two sons.  He would do anything for either one of them.  He has coached Chris since the t-ball years all the way into high school baseball.  He has coached his basketball teams all through middle school and has been doing the same with Matt.  If ever Dennis had to miss one of his boys' games, it was because he was out of town.  I think I can count on one hand the amount of games Dennis has missed.  Being able to coach is a gift from God.  Not only does Dennis love to coach his own boys, he takes pride in coaching the team as a whole.  He coaches as if they were his own sons. As much as he loves to win, more joy comes from the fact when he can TEACH the boys.  He is a fair coach.  He disciplines when needed yet knows how to have fun.  It amazes me at what he can do out on the baseball field and a basketball court.

He's an all or nothing kind of guy which for the most part, works for him. When he puts his mind to something, he succeeds.  Failure is not an option for him.  His determination never ceases to amaze me.  He always wants to improve.  For instance, not only did he beat his last year's marathon time but he crushed it and even broke his 4 hour goal!  He's physically fit.  He's mentally fit.  He may not always seem it but he's very compassionate.  He's funny.  He's comical.  He can relieve tension in any situation.  He can get a room laughing like crazy.  He loves God and isn't afraid to tell you that you need to ask God into your life too.  He's persistent when something is important to him.  He's passionate about what he believes in.  He can fix a toilet and roof a house.  He's dug up a swimming pool IN THE RAIN that he found on Craigslist which saved us a ton of money.  When he wanted to give up digging it out, I knew he actually wouldn't because that's who he is.  He has the same love for beach vacations as I do and is like a little kid once we actually get there.  He drives me crazy when all he wants to do is play in the sand and water KNOWING the grocery shopping needs to get done, but I wouldn't have it any other way. 

He's conquered anxiety for the most part.  It's not to say he never has an issue creep up on him but his determination in not letting anxiety win has been proven over and over since he hasn't taken anxiety meds in YEARS!  He held it together through my breast cancer scare and then some!  He had to still coach AND plan Chris' graduation party when we went through that.  He had to cook the meals and take care of me and laundry and the boys and still do his job.  He is my superman!

He is a dreamer but also a realist.  He jumps at opportunities.....sometimes before thinking and wonders what the heck he got himself into but then it becomes a challenge he believes he will conquer (and usually does.)  In these cases I call him my Peter (the apostle who jumped out of the boat before thinking about what he was doing.)  He supports me 99.9% of the time.  He's a praying man.  Like I said, he loves God.

He would do anything for me and I know it.  If I didn't know it was wrong to put someone on a pedestal, that's where I'd have him.  God says til death do us part.  I hear heaven is the most amazing place ever.  A place we can't even imagine being as unfathomable as we're told it is.  But in my mind, right now, heaven won't be heaven without being able to be with Dennis and I truly hope God will allow me to still have Dennis with me somehow, someway when that day comes (a long, long time from now.)

I'm so grateful for God's timing.  Had I not met Dennis in high school, someone else would have snatched him up and I would have had to settle for someone else.  Thank you God for this man.

Happy Birthday, Den!

Best of Intentions

      Well, the morning started out with the intention of heading out to Plymouth for some time with the ladies to pray for my friend who is battling cancer.  Figured I would have time to stop and pick up a Starbucks on the way.  Heck, I even had a decent hair morning in spite of the humidity and rain!  However, in addition to the rain causing slower traffic than usual, we get stopped by a long train on the way to school.  Add to that the drop off line being horrendously long (tell your kids to STOP, DROP and ROLL people!  Lol! Just kidding), we get to the school 10 minutes later than I had planned which in itself was still okay because the boys weren't late....I left early enough, thank God, to have compensated for the unexpected delay.

   I pull over and plug the address into GPS and realize there's no way I'd make it to the prayer meeting in time.  So, the guilt starts kicking in because I haven't been to one of these prayer meetings since they were started back in June. I stay at the side of the road for a moment praying, looking at another Care Pages update for another breast cancer fighter who is STILL fighting hard and asking for prayer not only for her but other breast cancer survivors who are fighting to this day.  I realize, guilt is the last thing I should be allowing in my life.  Who cares if I pray here at the side of the road or in a nice, warm, comfy home, probably filled with the delicious scent of coffee.
    But still, I was wondering why God would allow these delays knowing my intentions were for something I believe He put on my heart to do.   Sometimes in life it's easy to see right away why God puts an obstacle in our path.  Perhaps you're stopped by every traffic light and are getting ticked but a few minutes down the road you see a HORRIBLE accident which is apparent had just happened.  That could have been you.  Other times it's more baffling because you truly believe this is what God told you to do yet the obstacles prohibited you to do it.

Guilt can come in and tell you that you didn't try hard enough. You may feel like you failed God because you didn't accomplish what He told you to do.  Guilt is not your friend people!  God has come to free you from guilt.  So, I take a different look at the situation and realize, my heart was right with God.  My intentions were right with God.  God looks at the heart above all else.  I truly planned to do what He wanted me to do.

    Another occurrence like this happened many years ago.  I remember Chris being about pre-school age.  He had really bad flat feet and needed special inserts for his shoes which cost more money than Dennis and I had.  We weren't financially able to buy things on a moment's notice so I had to save up.  I remember being in church one Sunday morning and the sermon was about tithing and giving and basically you cannot out give God.  He preached the blessings you receive back from God will always be more than what you can imagine.  Keep in mind, we were NOT doing great financially.  We tease Chris that he grew up on hot dogs and Matt is growing up on prime rib.  But, I was so convicted by that message and actually felt God telling me to give the money I had saved up for these inserts for Chris' shoes.  I don't even remember why I had carried that money in my purse instead of tucking it away (but that's not the point of the story.)   I looked in my purse to pull out the money to give when the basket passed and it wasn't there!   I was actually so disappointed.  I wanted so badly to do this for God.  It was one of my first lessons I can honestly say I "took" with me about obedience.  God just wanted to see if I would do what He asked.  He was looking at my heart.

    It just so happens that Dennis decided to take my car into the shop this morning which meant he needed a ride home.  Had I been at that prayer meeting, I wouldn't have been able to be here for him.  With family coming into town this weekend, I have running around to do to prepare which I was going to do right after leaving Tina's.  If I had been at that prayer meeting, I wouldn't have taken the time to sit and write about my experience this morning.  Does it sound like I'm justifying?  Maybe to some but to me it's just another message from God telling me that His timing is perfect even when we don't understand it.  As long as you take the time to listen to Him, and your heart is in tune with His, He'll work it all out.  

Have a blessed day!

Worry and Stress or Peace and Joy?

Peace and joy disappeared from my life the other day and it was AWFUL!  My daily life has become one of contentment in all situations, at least that is what I strive for.   Dennis saw a side of me he hadn't seen in a long time - a stressful Teresa - and he made a point of telling me how horrible it was to see me like that after all this time.

The last two years I have striven to alleviate stress from my life.  Fewer unnecessary commitments.  Saying no to things I would have said yes to in the past.  Saying yes to more fun things.  Allowing the house to "go" of chores for a day or two.  Talking more about God.  Praying more to God.  (Still need to read the Bible more.)  Looking for God's purpose in all situations, good or bad.   I was starting to really live life the way I think God intended.  It was wonderful.  But then, all of a sudden for some reason an overwhelming amount of stress of getting things done whooshed down on me like a ton of bricks. (As if the world would have fallen apart had I not accomplished what "needed" to be done.)  I hated the way I felt,  Dennis didn't like it and I'm sure God was shaking His head at me thinking, "My child, why are you allowing this back into your life?  You have experienced my peace and joy in good times and bad.  Do not let the world tell you it has to be like this."   The world says we need to be in control of everything.  Right, how's that going for you?  Hardships are a given in life but stressing long enough about it or worrying long enough about our problem will not make it go away. 

My perspective on life has changed yet again.  Well, maybe not changed but I was given a reminder with a good swift kick in the butt about what this life on earth is all about.  Fact is, we are born and we will die.  It is what we do for God's glory in the years in between that matter.  My friend, whose cancer is back would slap me (well, not literally but would give a good tongue lashing) if I started crying continuously how unfair this situation is.  There is NO woe is me allowed.  She is the ultimate example, thus far in my life, of how a person lives a life of joy and peace.  Her attitude is one of selflessness.  Her attitude is one that says, "If this is for God's glory then use me, Lord."  I imagine she experiences some sadness for her family and I know she has tough days as well but she knows how to give it to God and trusts completely that HE has this.  By the world's standard, she should be stressing and worrying, yet she has peace....the kind of peace I want to continue to have. It is impossible to understand this kind of peace if you don't have Jesus in your life.  Phillippians 4:7 "And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding (comprehension), will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  Do you have Jesus in your life?  Have you given control of your life back to Jesus?  Have you asked Him to come into your heart to reign as your personal Savior?  Who knows, maybe God's timing for you is now to invite Him in.  I have which is how I have been able to experience His peace and contentment in good times and bad.  My laundry awaits me as I type.  My workout is still pending as I type.  Bills need to be paid as I type but it is all good.  I will not stress.  It will get done.  Writing for God's glory is more important.

Have a blessed day all!